16 August 2010
Please find below an excellent example of REFRESHING THE FAMILIAR per the August exercise from my monthly newsletter. Thank you Carol Isaacson and Arlene Weinberg. Very nice crafting. A chilling scenario from Carol. I’ve suggested to Carol that she extend this into a full short story. You may recognise some of this in a publication some time soon…
She wandered through the house, everything was ready, he would be home soon and she was looking forward to his return. The children were fed, bathed and either in bed or diligently doing their homework in their rooms as was to be expected. The kitchen was gleaming, the benches glowing with reflected light, just as he had designed it. The fridge free of childish paintings and notes from school thrummed gently, inside sat his favourite meal and a bottle of chilled champagne to celebrate his latest, and no doubt successful, business deal. The laundry was spotless, all the clothes were washed, dried, ironed and each item of clothing neatly folded and colour coded in their respective wardrobes.In the living room a fire burned in the fire place and each cushion was in its prescribed place on the sofas. The tray of drinks and one glass sat on the coffee table next to a stack of newspapers and magazines carefully positioned within easy reach of the single armchair that dominated the room. With a shudder she realised the chair was slightly out of position. How had that happened? How had she not noticed? She quickly moved it back into place with a sigh of relief. Everything was in its place and all would soon be well with the world when he returned home to a her special welcome. She felt the comforting weight in her pocket, yes all would finally be well when he returned home.
She glanced at the clock, he would be here in perhaps 5 more minutes, and in doing so caught a glimpse of her face in the mirror. Turning her head from side to side she was satisfied that the swelling and bruising had faded well enough to be hidden by her make up. She heard the taxi draw up and her heart began to beat faster. At the sound of his key in the lock she slipped her hand into her pocket, her finger found the trigger and she slipped the safety catch off.
Yes all would finally be well in just a few seconds.
1 July 2010
Below find the exercise I refer to in my July newsletter. Thank you Arlene. This whole episode is presented from the Point of View of just one character but the reader gets the impression of a crowd within just three paragraphs.
POINT OF VIEW – exercise from Arlene Weinberg
The tall, blonde woman gave a delighted cry. “Babs, darling!” Puckering up, she bent way, way down to Barbara. Desperate to do the right thing, Barbara raised herself onto the tips of her toes. The blonde’s fire-engine lips smacked the air about two inches to the left of her hostess’s cheek. Barbara found her own lips and nose squashed halfway up the side of the woman’s alabaster neck.
The man beside her beamed. “Barbara, my dear. Hermione has been on at me, wanting to meet you. When we heard that Jeffrey had come back from Africa with a little bride in tow, the wives’ club already had you signed up with a bridge partner!” He slapped Jeffrey on the shoulder. Barbara blinked like a somewhat myopic fawn while her mind fumbled for a suitable response. She had never met either of them before. The force of such effusiveness washed their names from her consciousness.
Jeffrey, meanwhile, had answered the door again. The sharp London air catapulted in another salvo of strangers. They were all tall, frightfully posh and oozing with bonhomie. Jeffrey was suddenly taller and more jovial than she’d ever seen him and seemed to be speaking in code with these lawyers and their wives. Oblivious, he circulated, offering their guests wine. Barbara felt marooned in a sea of small talk. “Africa, yes…the Queen’s English…the colonies, yes…civilisation, ha ha…” She thought her cheekbones would crack
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